40 Questions We’re Afraid to Ask – #10
In other words, why do I do what I do?
Good question, and I’m sure (at least I hope) I’m not the only one who wonders much of the time!
The question, in many ways, takes us back to the original question in this series about what we would do if this were the last day of our life. I believe there are multiple reasons for doing what we do and not doing what we’d like, and those reasons will be different for each of us, but if we were to put it all in a nutshell, I think the answer would come down to one thing . . .
- fear of success
- fear of stepping outside my comfort zone
- fear of what people might think
- fear of the unknown
- fear of change
- fear from our past
Fear, in its right context, can be a good thing, protecting us from harm. But fear can also be our greatest enemy, keeping us from doing the very things we want to do and causing us to do things we really would not choose to do if we simply made the appropriate choices.
I think discipline, self-doubt and habit come into play, as well; but could it be our lack of discipline, as well as our lack of willingness to change unproductive and undesirable habits also grow out of certain fears. It also has a lot to do with how we meet our Six Human Needs: certainty, uncertainty (variety), significance, love/connection, growth, and contribution — any or all of which can be met in positive or negative/unproductive ways. If something we do meets two or more of these needs at a high level, it becomes a habit, or even an addictive behavior or activity.
What are some of your thoughts?