Having a bad day?

Having a bad day?

bad dayEver feel like you’re having a bad day? One of my closest friends when I lived in Washington DC used to say, “Every day above the dirt’s a good day!” I loved that! To him, there was no such thing as a bad day.  

Now, that’s not to say he didn’t have his occasional bad mood or down times, but it was very seldom that I saw it, and we were around each other a lot.  And when he did, it didn’t last long at all.  He just had a great attitude about life.

Ah . . .that’s it . . . attitude!

I know . . . we’ve heard it all before.
But I’m not just talking about positive thinking and all that.

I love what Tony Robbins says about positive thinking.

Positive thinking is like walking out into your garden and saying, “There are no weeds! There are no weeds!”  Of course there are weeds.  See things as they are, not worse than they are.  Then . . . see things better than they are.

In other words, be realistic. Accept the reality of the situation and allow it to be just as it is . . . not worse than it is.  Only then can you begin to see the possibilities for making it better.

There's no such thing as a bad day . . . just a bad attitudeBad day = bad attitude

If you feel like you’re having a bad day, it doesn’t mean the day itself is actually bad. If that were the case, everybody in the world would be having the same experience.

The day is “bad” only because that’s the story you’re telling yourself. It’s a matter of your state of mind, and our mind certainly can be our greatest enemy at times.  That’s not to say you may have some negative things going on around you.  It’s the meaning you give to those things that makes the difference . . . the story you tell yourself based on those things, which is, more often than not, based on things that have happened in the past and the stories you’ve told yourself based on those things.  It can become a never-ending cycle, leading to one “bad day” after another . . . after another . . . after another.

So . . .

How do we break the cycle and have a good day?

The answer is in what we call “The Triad”.

The TriadFocus — What are you focusing on right now? Are you fixated on all the bad stuff that’s happening to you?  Are you burying yourself in the situation you’re in right now rather than possible solutions? Are you hanging onto all that stuff that happened to you in the past — a past that no longer exists except in your head — or are you developing strategies to move forward with your day . . . and your life?  Are you playing the role of victim or problem solver?  Are you complaining about all the stuff you don’t have or are you expressing gratitude inside for what you do have?

Physiology & Posture — Consider your physical posture right now.  Are you shoulders slumped or are you standing or sitting up straight with you head held high and your shoulders back? Do you find yourself looking down at the ground or toward what’s out there in front of you? Is your posture closed, arms crossed in front of you, tucked deep inside your pockets, or clasped over your head in frustration, or are you in a relaxed position with you hands and body open? Are you frowning or smiling? (It’s said that it takes fewer muscles and less energy to smile than to frown.)

Language — What words are you using in talking to yourself and/or others?  Are you asking yourself, “Why does this always happen to me?” or are you saying instead, “what can I do with this?”
Are you cussing out someone right now for putting you down or disagreeing with you, or are you stopping to say, “You know, they may have a point”?

Changing just one of these three components will quickly begin to affect the others.  Change your posture, and you’ll find that your mental focus begins to switch gears.  As your mental focus changes, you’ll find yourself using different words and phrases, and the new language will now, in turn, continue to affect your posture and physiology.

It also works in the opposite direction.  Change the language you use — the words and phrases you use — and your mental focus will change, which in turn affects your posture and physiology.

Good day or bad day. The choice is yours.And the component with which you begin doesn’t matter either.  Begin with changing your mental focus, and it will begin to make a difference in both you language and your physiology.  Change your physiology, and you’ll probably notice a change in both your language and mental focus.  Change your language, and both you mental focus and your physiology will begin to change.

Changing all three will totally change your day . . . and your life. Good day or bad day . . . the choice is yours.

Steve Vernon photo

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